diff --git a/src/durable-object.ts b/src/durable-object.ts
index 14e0ff9..2fdd007 100644
--- a/src/durable-object.ts
+++ b/src/durable-object.ts
@@ -15,6 +15,7 @@ import { verifyEventSignature, hasPaidForRelay, processEvent, queryEvents } from
 import { extensionRegistry } from './relay/services/registry.js';
 import { initOpenDating } from './protocols/opendating/index.js';
 import { runHousekeeperTick } from './cloudflare/housekeeper.js';
+import { checkDirectMessagePolicy } from './protocols/opendating/services/dm-policy.js';
 
 // Session attachment data structure (minimal - auth state stored in session)
 interface SessionAttachment {
@@ -930,6 +931,30 @@ export class RelayWebSocket implements DurableObject {
         }
       }
 
+      if (event.kind === 1059) {
+        const recipientPubkey = event.tags.find((tag) => tag[0] === 'p')?.[1];
+        try {
+          const decision = await checkDirectMessagePolicy(
+            this.env.RELAY_DATABASE,
+            relayCtx.authenticatedPubkey || '',
+            recipientPubkey,
+          );
+          if (decision !== 'allowed') {
+            const reason =
+              decision === 'blocked'
+                ? 'blocked: od:blocked'
+                : decision === 'not-matched'
+                  ? 'restricted: od:not-matched'
+                  : 'invalid: gift wrap recipient required';
+            this.sendOK(session.webSocket, event.id, false, reason);
+            return;
+          }
+        } catch {
+          this.sendOK(session.webSocket, event.id, false, 'blocked: dm policy unavailable');
+          return;
+        }
+      }
+
       // Process the event (save to database)
       const result = await processEvent(event, session.id, this.env);
 
@@ -1407,4 +1432,4 @@ export class RelayWebSocket implements DurableObject {
       console.error('Error sending EVENT:', error);
     }
   }
-}
\ No newline at end of file
+}
diff --git a/src/protocols/opendating/services/dm-policy.ts b/src/protocols/opendating/services/dm-policy.ts
new file mode 100644
index 0000000..ea29246
--- /dev/null
+++ b/src/protocols/opendating/services/dm-policy.ts
@@ -0,0 +1,46 @@
+import { deriveMemberId } from '../storage/d1/membership.js';
+
+export type DirectMessageDecision =
+  | 'allowed'
+  | 'blocked'
+  | 'not-matched'
+  | 'invalid-recipient';
+
+export async function checkDirectMessagePolicy(
+  db: D1Database,
+  senderPubkey: string,
+  recipientPubkey: string | undefined,
+): Promise<DirectMessageDecision> {
+  if (!recipientPubkey || !/^[0-9a-f]{64}$/i.test(recipientPubkey)) {
+    return 'invalid-recipient';
+  }
+  if (senderPubkey === recipientPubkey) return 'allowed';
+
+  const senderId = deriveMemberId(senderPubkey);
+  const recipientId = deriveMemberId(recipientPubkey);
+  const row = await db.withSession('first-primary').prepare(
+    `SELECT
+       EXISTS(
+         SELECT 1 FROM od_blocks
+         WHERE (blocker_member_id = ? AND blocked_member_id = ?)
+            OR (blocker_member_id = ? AND blocked_member_id = ?)
+       ) AS blocked,
+       EXISTS(
+         SELECT 1 FROM od_matches
+         WHERE state = 'active'
+           AND ((member_a = ? AND member_b = ?) OR (member_a = ? AND member_b = ?))
+       ) AS matched`,
+  ).bind(
+    senderId,
+    recipientId,
+    recipientId,
+    senderId,
+    senderId,
+    recipientId,
+    recipientId,
+    senderId,
+  ).first<{ blocked: number; matched: number }>();
+
+  if (row?.blocked) return 'blocked';
+  return row?.matched ? 'allowed' : 'not-matched';
+}
diff --git a/tests/opendating/integration/services.test.ts b/tests/opendating/integration/services.test.ts
index b464a66..e0a9cc4 100644
--- a/tests/opendating/integration/services.test.ts
+++ b/tests/opendating/integration/services.test.ts
@@ -14,6 +14,7 @@ import { initOpenDatingExtension } from '../../../src/protocols/opendating/exten
 import { grantToken, clampAge, publicProfile } from '../../../src/protocols/opendating/services/discovery/service.js';
 import { validateProfileContent } from '../../../src/protocols/opendating/services/profile/service.js';
 import { BlockService } from '../../../src/protocols/opendating/services/block/service.js';
+import { checkDirectMessagePolicy } from '../../../src/protocols/opendating/services/dm-policy.js';
 import { MatcherService } from '../../../src/protocols/opendating/services/matcher/service.js';
 import { createEnvelope } from '../../../src/protocols/opendating/protocol/envelope.js';
 import type { OpenDatingServiceContext } from '../../../src/protocols/opendating/services/interface.js';
@@ -469,3 +470,39 @@ describe('Block service (D1)', () => {
     });
   });
 });
+
+describe('Direct-message policy (D1)', () => {
+  const alicePubkey = 'a'.repeat(64);
+  const bobPubkey = 'b'.repeat(64);
+
+  it('allows only active, unblocked matches and self archive copies', async () => {
+    const membership = new D1MembershipStore(db as unknown as D1Database);
+    await membership.ensureMember(alicePubkey);
+    await membership.ensureMember(bobPubkey);
+    const aliceId = deriveMemberId(alicePubkey);
+    const bobId = deriveMemberId(bobPubkey);
+
+    await expect(
+      checkDirectMessagePolicy(db as unknown as D1Database, alicePubkey, bobPubkey)
+    ).resolves.toBe('not-matched');
+
+    await db.prepare(
+      `INSERT INTO od_matches (match_id, member_a, member_b, state, created_at, updated_at)
+       VALUES ('dm-match', ?, ?, 'active', 1000, 1000)`
+    ).bind(aliceId, bobId).run();
+    await expect(
+      checkDirectMessagePolicy(db as unknown as D1Database, alicePubkey, bobPubkey)
+    ).resolves.toBe('allowed');
+
+    await db.prepare(
+      `INSERT INTO od_blocks (blocker_member_id, blocked_member_id, created_at)
+       VALUES (?, ?, 1001)`
+    ).bind(bobId, aliceId).run();
+    await expect(
+      checkDirectMessagePolicy(db as unknown as D1Database, alicePubkey, bobPubkey)
+    ).resolves.toBe('blocked');
+    await expect(
+      checkDirectMessagePolicy(db as unknown as D1Database, alicePubkey, alicePubkey)
+    ).resolves.toBe('allowed');
+  });
+});